Saturday, November 13, 2004

Shallow faces the truth

If you think about it, series 5 should really have come to an abrupt end with 5.13 Earlier Than Usual, finishing up with Glory holding Buffy's severed head up by the hair before tossing it aside. In the background we can see the dismembered remains of the Scoobies, an arm here, a leg there; perhaps Willow like a broken plastic doll. It's horridly reminiscent of the last episode of Blackadder II.

'Now, where were we, Dawnie?' Glory drawls, wiping her hands and striding forward and past the camera.

Next week: 2.16 Realistic Passion, where Angelus impales Willow, Xander and Joyce on the same pole like a horrific kebab, and leaves it on Buffy's front lawn for when she opens her curtains.

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Shallow and the Bush dynasty

On the morning of November 9th 1988, I was in the bathrooms at our student residences when Steve, our American student, came in. 'Who've we got, Shallow?' he asked. I swelled with pride at being able to take even a tiny role in the presidential election process.

Assuming a carefully neutral tone I told him that George Bush had won.

'Oh man,' he said. 'Now I'm going to remember, for the next four years, that you told me we got Bush.'

I wished I hadn't told him. I'd be really, really surprised if I saw Steve in my bathroom tomorrow morning, but in the unlikely event that I do, I hope I've got better news for him. I mean, it's serious now. In 1988, I didn't want Bush to win, but I wasn't afraid for my life if he did.